Gentleman Don't...

Listening to Gabe Bondoc.

Have not written from the Heart in Awhile. So here goes.

Came to a realization.

I'm pretty disrespectful. Mainly towards females.

Yeah. I have joking intentions. But they can easily be misconstrued and taken differently.

I realized I do use the terms Bitch, Ho, Slu, Beezy, Trick. And not even on occasion. They are in my daily vocabulary.

Trite and Overused. But my mother did raise me better. This is most definitely not the way I want to convey the man that I am.

Defensive Mechanism? Excuse. Also, it could be seen as myself acting/speaking this way because I have experienced certain situations that altered my views on "opening up".

I admit. I am a new person. I am more cautious on making myself vulnerable; however, it can't be used as a scapegoat. In no way does that justify me using these terms and acting like this in general.

Joking or Not. It is not justifiable.

I have heard a story of certain individuals overhearing a conversation I had with one of my roomates. Yes. Disrespectful it is to take advantage of a woman, You heard it out of my own mouth.

That is the Alan I wish people would see each and everyday.

That is the Alan I am going to show people each and everyday.

Yes. You hear it all the time. But ALAN! Doesn't being the nice guy always put you in the friend zone??

You could say that. But.

Honestly. If people see my true self. If people see I am not the "Bitch this, Trick That" kinda guy. Then that is all that matters to me.

Thank you. And I apologize if you have ever been at the wrong end of this ordeal.